Running

the mirror is where she comes
Face to face with her fears
Her reflection looked forward on to her
After all these years
However how she's tried to be
Something besides herself
Now time has passed and she's ended up
Somewhere else with regret

Christina Aguilera - Soar....

Running is something i've been doing for the past four years of my life. I say only four years because that is when I can recall actually beginning to lose control and not actually doing anything to stop it. I've avoided every mirror possible, i've even ruined friendships and lied to myself to avoid the TRUTH. Where has it landed me? Surrounded by four mirrors. Every secret, lie, message revealed. How does it feel? Scary, to deal with everything that i've avoided for years, to look back on the good things that I've ruined because I simply couldn't get my shit together. They say things are usually seen better in hindsight, and this is right in many cases. However, on thing that I must take from these mirrors is that I need to believe in myself and my gut feeling, its there for a reason!!! I take full responsibility for everything that has happened but i seem to be stuck not knowing where to go from here! I've never had to make a educated move, it was always an impulsive reckless movement. Now that I am taking my life back and I don't want to have to reap the consequences anymore, how do I make smart decisions? Well i've been to JUST DO IT like nike. I guess there is no step by step directions on how to live life other than to just LIVE. But i do believe there are certain rules/guidelines that I should live by & certain realizations that i just need to face:
1. The most important relationship you will have is the one with yourself
2. What you think, is what you become
3. Love all, trust few, do wrong to no one
4. How they treat you is their karma how you react is yours
5. QUALITY always over quantity
6. FRIEND, LOVE, CARE are all words that are tossed out too lightly
7. Everything happens for a reason, there is always a string even if it is not attached to what you expected
8. 6 Degrees of separation is TOO real
9. Looks have a large weight on how you are treated/perceived
10. EVERYONE cheats
11. It will always be bros before hoes but rarely chicks before dicks
12. Friendship must come before a relationship

.... the list will continue......

but in the mean time....

Now in life there's gonna be times
When you're feeling low
And in your mind insecurities seem to take control
We start to look outside ourselves
For acceptance and approval
We keep forgetting that the one thing we should know is
Don't be scared
To fly alone
Find a path that is your own
Love will open every door
See in your hands the world is yours
Don't hold back and always know
All the answers you will unfold
What are you waiting for
Spread your wings and soar